Grave news, Planeswalker — that was no secret spice in your fancy dinner outing. You have died, but in so doing, you’ve been thrown into and through the Blind Eternities! You’re falling fast into Alara’s orbit, but which Shard would suit you best — Bant, Esper, Grixis, Jund, or Naya? Answer quickly!

What Shard of Alara Should You Call Home?

Spelunking — caves are great for hiding!

Going to a museum — nothing better than looking at beautiful works of art and appreciating them.

A long day of playing my favorite video game — crushing thousands of enemies is a great source of stress relief.

Working in the garden — guiding and cultivating new life is fulfilling.

Reading — leisure time is a great time to hone one’s mind.

The carefully organized ingredients — efficiency is key, and I’ve got a menu for the week.

A most splendid roast which has been marinating for three days. Tonight we feast!

The leftover drawer — waste not, want not.

The fresh fruits and veggies I got from some neighbors at a farmer swap — maybe a soup and sourdough bread!

Manager: I got my position “fair” and “square”, and I treated all my employees “fairly”, as far as the lawyers understood.

Assistant Manager: I did my best to ensure that the leaders had what they needed to succeed, even though they were absent most of the time…

Accountant: each and every detail was filed and sorted appropriately.

Veteran worker: I caused chaos for fun and kept stealing lunches from the workroom.

Newbie worker: I did what I was supposed to and — wait, that was you!?

We Are the Champions — it’s fun to sing in crowds!

Another One Bites the Dust — it’s a motto to live by.

Killer Queen — acknowledging the top predator and giving them praise ensures survival.

We Will Rock You — stomping is my preferred method of dance.

Bohemian Rhapsody — yes, I have it memorized front to back and back to front.

Oh for sure, sphinxes and angels are uptight and pretentious.

Yeah? Well dragons and demons are evil and destructive!

Goody two-shoes, as always — angels and beasts are self-aggrandizing and stupid, respectively.

Excuse you — sphinxes and demons are smart, but they’re also arrogant jerks.

Only because we are perfect or close enough, unlike those impulsive and foolish dragons and beasts.

You love hierarchy and organization and knowing where to be, as well as your community. A little boring? Well if the neighbors think so, they should try coming over to your “Yoga, Kombucha, Pottery” parties!

Beginning in Bant!

You’re going to be a big hit in Esper! Between brushing up on your knowledge and removing random body parts to see where the drill should go, it’ll be a good time! Just be careful at the dance scene— Electronic Music is a lot more literal.

Engineering in Esper!

Crush your enemies and make them cower before you. If you don’t mind the smell of corpses, you’ll go far. (But be mindful of your employees— you never know when an “assistant manager” is looking for a promotion.)

Grinding in Grixis!

See a shadow on the ground? Run. Hearing something skittering in the bushes? Hide. Is that people over there? Even worse. Everything is out to eat you, but at least it’s more exciting than those “Yoga, Kombucha, Pottery” Parties they’re throwing in Bant, right?

Journeying in Jund!

An equal mix of solitude and community is right for you. Have fun gardening and living off the land, just be sure you keep an eye on those roaming beasts. They won’t eat you, but they might flatten your house. At least it’s far from the office, and no one’s stealing your lunches anymore.

Napping in Naya!

Bant, Esper, Grixis, Jund, or Naya — which of Alara’s three-color shards would you live on?