2024’s EDHighlights - Massacre Girl, Known Killer
(Massacre Girl, Known Killer | Art by Billy Christian)
Did I do it?
Hello again! And welcome back (again) to EDHighlights, the mini-series where I’ll be building decks for the year’s most popular commander for each color combination. As 2024’s set releases come to a close, I’d like to see which commanders from each color struck a chord with the Commander community. We’ll be starting off with the monocolored commanders, and each deck in this series will have its own special twist to make it stand out just a little bit from the crowd. This series will go in order, and today we’re onto black. This deck will be helmed by… Massacre Girl, Known Killer!
Massacre Girl has actually become the 13th most popular mono-black commander ever, with 3903 decks on EDHREC as of the time of writing. Notably, it’s the 3rd most popular commander from Murders at Karlov Manor, trailing pretty far behind both Voja, Jaws of the Conclave and Judith, Carnage Connoisseur.
You’ll have to be more specific.
Massacre Girl is relatively straightforward. We want our opponents’ creatures to die. But, we want them to die in a specific, agonizing way: dying due to a state-based action after having 0 or less toughness. The flavor of this card is pretty cool when you consider how sadistic it is to watch your opponents’ creatures wither away into nothing.
Massacre Girl will reward us when our opponents’ creatures die horrifically, so we’ll be making sure that happens as often as possible. To that end, we’ll be including a lot of toughness-reducing effects and a lot of payoffs to capitalize on the death we’ll be creating.
There’s only one problem with this strategy: our opponents will eventually run out of creatures. This is a relatively heavy control deck, and there’s a few “locks” in the deck that would just prevent opponents from keeping creatures on the battlefield for long. So, that brings me to the deck’s twist: we’ll be “donating” as many creatures as we reasonably can to our opponents. This will (hopefully) provide a constant stream of death triggers that we can benefit from.
So, with a plan in place, let’s make a deck!
Death is my life's work
The core of this deck is ways to make creatures die, so I’ll be starting there. Massacre Girl gives all of our creatures wither, meaning that they deal damage in the form of -1/-1 counters, which already fuels our commander. But, this is Commander, so we’re taking our commander’s abilities to their logical extreme. To that end, I’ve included the brand-new Maha, Its Feathers Night and the cards it combos with, (Kaervek, the Spiteful and Night of Souls' Betrayal). Together, these cards make it so our opponents won’t be able to keep creatures on the board, unless they’ve somehow buffed those creatures before we land the combo. This is pretty oppressive, and it’ll let us draw a ton of cards with Massacre Girl’s ability.
Other than that, there’s a ton of ways to make our opponents’ creatures die. Some of the biggest hits include Massacre Wurm (which will also drain life totals as the game goes on), the recently released Nowhere to Run (which will make sure we can keep targeting our opponents’ boards), and Dismember (which basically allows us to destroy a creature and draw a card at instant speed for just one mana).
I’m also excited about including Yawgmoth, Thran Physician. This card is such a powerhouse in so many decks, and this is no exception. It’ll draw extra cards and distribute -1/-1 counters, two of the decks’ top priorities. The Meathook Massacre is also fantastic here, and can straight up end the game if it lands on a well-developed board state. I’m a big fan of Virtue of Persistence, too, because it’ll kill a creature and eventually let us take advantage of the full graveyards we’ll be creating.
Looking a gift horse in the mouth
So, I’ve covered all the ways that this deck can kill creatures. But, like I mentioned, our opponents will eventually run out. To counteract this, I’ve included 10 ways to restock our opponents’ boards. This means I get to play one of my favorite cards: Clackbridge Troll. While the probability that this 8/8 will EVER get to attack is very low, but it will likely act as an overcosted Phyrexian Arena that creates more death triggers for Massacre Girl. Another card I like here is Hunted Bonebrute. This card is similar to Clackbridge Troll, in that it’s undercosted for its stats but gives our opponents creatures to compensate. There’s one more creature like that in the deck, Hunted Horror, which is a 2-mana 7/7. That’s just absurd, especially when we can capitalize on the supposed drawback this card is designed with.
I’ve also included Slaughter Specialist, which donates creatures AND acts as a payoff for our opponents’ creatures dying. Plus, it’s a 2-mana 3/3, which is a good deal in my book. Akroan Horse is a funny include here, providing a repeatable stream of tokens for 2 out of our 3 opponents. Dowsing Dagger makes a few bodies for one of our opponents and (eventually) becomes a great land. Our commander even has menace, making it easier to flip!
There’s more repeatable token generators, like Genesis Chamber, Curse of Disturbance, and Forbidden Orchard. All of these cards will keep the death triggers flowing throughout the game.
Rounding out this group is Tribute to Horobi. This card is great, providing up to 6 tokens for our opponents (that we later steal), and then providing card draw on an evasive creature. And it does all of that for only 2 mana and a few turns of waiting! I think this one should see a lot more play in Aristocrat decks.
In matters of life and death...
So, we’ll be making creatures die a lot. What now? How do we win the game? Well, we can start by growing our creatures when other creatures die. Blade of the Bloodchief, Tarrian's Soulcleaver, and Yahenni, Undying Partisan put in a lot of work here. These cards quickly become threats no one can ignore, and are quite strong.
Blood Artist and his older, cooler sibling Vein Ripper can provide massive amounts of life drain throughout the game. Similarly, Black Market will provide a huge amount of mana advantage throughout the game. With just one board wipe, this can easily provide double-digit amounts of mana each turn.
Wrapping up this part of the deck, there’s Morbid Opportunist for card advantage, Drivnod, Carnage Dominus to double everything else I’ve already talked about, and even Revel in Riches as a funky alternate win condition. It should, I think, be relatively easy to turn on Revel in Riches given all the creatures we’ll be giving out to our opponents. So, I think it’s a shoe-in here.
With all of that out of the way, let’s take a look at the whole decklist…
Utter End
And that’s it! This deck was pretty fun to build, as there were a surprising amount of cards that synergize well with -1/-1 counters. Necroskitter does a great impression of Tergrid, God of Fright, Spitting Dilophosaurus will let our creatures punch through for damage more often, and Blowfly Infestation ensures we share the -1/-1 love.
What do you think about this deck? I’m personally surprised that 2 commanders from Murders at Karlov Manor have made it onto this list, considering the set's initial reception.
I’ll see you next week, when I explore the year’s top mono-red commander!
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