Mechanical Memories — A Tale of Three Thalias
October 23, 2023 by
Jubilee Finnegan 
(Thalia, Guardian of Thraben | art by Johannes Voss)
Hello there! Welcome to the first episode of Mechanical Memories, the show where I take you through the history of Magic’s mechanics, designs, and their relevance to the Commander format. I’m Jubilee Finnegan. You may know me from works such as sapphics on Theros, sapphics on Tarkir, and sapphics on Ravnica. Now, I’m joining up with the EDHREC team to talk about Magic design, starting with Thraben’s protector herself: Thalia!
What a card! Eternal format players will know that Thalia’s tax effect is incredibly valuable, providing efficient protection for aggressive creature decks. Originally printed in Dark Ascension, Thalia acts as a representation of the humans’ resistance against the monsters of Innistrad. While Undying and Morbid rewarded the themes of their related creature types, Thalia asks you to play “fair” Magic. Her relevance in 60-card formats is due to her ability to punish efficient removal. A two-mana Fatal Push or one-mana Force of Will makes her well worth the slot, especially since she can attack aggressively with first strike. By resisting the noncreature spells of the Vampires or Spirits, Thalia rewards the boots-on-the-ground playstyle of Human typal or other aggressive decks.
Her appearances in Commander certainly reflect this. Sure, she shows up in Gaddock Teeg or Yasharn, Implacable Earth Stax decks, but she also sees play in Greymond, Avacyn's Stalwart and Jeska, Thrice Reborn/Yoshimaru, Ever Faithful. Thalia’s ability allows these kinds of creature-centric decks that would normally struggle against 1-for-1 removal to thrive. Within the top hundred cards on EDHREC, not a single one is a creature spell that acts as removal. Thalia’s ability to delay that Mortify so that you can cast your Sigarda, Heron's Grace can be a game changer.
Thalia’s ability is part of a long line of tax effects in Magic. Her noncreature tax ability actually saw print nine years before her on Glowrider, though variations on it have existed throughout the game’s history. While versions originally punished specific colors, design slowly moved towards specific card types with Vryn Wingmare or Elspeth Conquers Death. These cards allow creature decks to compete against increasingly efficient combo and midrange decks.
Glowrider’s flavor text of "It is not yet time" leads us quite nicely into the next time we saw the Guardian of Thraben, this time as Thalia, Heretic Cathar. Here, she keeps her first strike but now makes creatures and nonbasic your opponents control enter tapped. In a way, the ability acts similarly to her prior version. Assuming your opponent is on a nonbasic-heavy build, all their spells are delayed by one turn. If they fetch into a dual land, both the fetch and fetched lands will enter tapped. Quite the value for a three mana card!
On the surface, the Thalias might remind you of a certain much-maligned four-letter word in Commander circles: Stax. Now, I’m of the opinion that Stax cards are fine, assuming they’re up to your playgroup’s style. But Thalia is presenting a different type of effect. While classical Stax cards like Winter Orb or the eponymous Smokestack say “no” to your opponents’ plans, tax effects like Thalia just say “not yet.” Sure, you can still cast that Terminate on my creature, but you’ll have to wait a turn.
The original Thalia came out in 2012, just a year after the first Commander product, while her sequel returned alongside Shadows over Innistrad block. What can be seen here is a design paradigm shift that aligns with the rise of Commander. If you want to reward creature decks, simply printing better creatures isn’t going to do the trick. If you do that, you end up with Deathrite Shamans and Tarmogoyfs that work in any Goodstuff deck while dominating 60-card formats. Instead, these cards lean into the strengths of creature decks while still allowing opponents to play their decks.
That’s why I think cards like Thalia aren’t in the same conversation as hardcore Stax. The common complaint around Stax cards is that they don’t let you play the game. Well, Thalia still lets you play your cards, but she’s going to punish strategies that exploit creature-centric decks. As pitch spells, mana-positive cards, and more resource-rich decks appear in the Commander format, a Thalia in the 99 allows your classic creature decks to withstand the deluge of spells coming your way. It's just a shame she never got a solid card to go in the command zone…
By god that’s the Church of Saint Traft’s music!
Thalia and The Gitrog Monster is a product of the new era of Commander and it shows. This Abzan amphibian retains the Heretic Cathar’s tap ability while adding deathtouch, card draw, and ramp. There’s a lot going on here (especially odd since there’s a textless version), but Thalia makes for a fun deck. Sure, there are certainly ways to profit off the sacrifice of lands, but at a base level, its asking you to play a straightforward resource game while punishing nonbasics of your opponents.
While your playgroup might rightfully balk at Grand Arbiter Augustin IV or Derevi, Empyrial Tactician, Thalia and The Gitrog Monster is a good way to introduce a low dosage of tax effects into the game. The other Guardian of Thraben and Heretic Cathar don’t see many of their own decks (536 decks and 162 decks respectively) since they mostly work to bolster their own strategies. If you only build around those effects, you end up with a deck that forces your opponent to play a ten-mana Farewell that totally blanks your board. However, Thalia and The Gitrog Monster provides an incredibly efficient attacker and card draw that keeps the game from stalling out.
While I can totally understand if you don’t love this effect, this represents an awesome shift in Magic design. Remember how I mentioned those color hate cards from early Magic? Those were either useless if you weren’t up against that color or they were blank cards. The most played Circle of Protection, the white one, appears in only 1,171 decks. As it turns out, most casual Commander players don’t want to spend their turns negating the damage of a Sun Titan. Further, classical Stax cards can sometimes struggle in Commander, with the variance of a 100-card deck making it difficult to consistently break parity on your Tangle Wire (But if you do… congrats!). Thalia finds a happy middle-ground. You’re not stopping your opponents from playing the game, but they also aren’t stopping you. It allows the game to progress towards an end, while slowing down strategies that would break the resource balance of the game. Next time your opponent tries to play a bunch of free spells, you and Thalia can just say…
“It is not yet time” - Glowrider, 2003
I’ve included a decklist for Thalia and The Gitrog Monster that embodies this philosophy of tax-over-Stax. I’ve avoided your classic lockout pieces in favor of a balance between tax and creature aggro. I’d love to hear about what tax and Stax cards you use in your decks, as well as what you might want to see for a fourth Thalia card! Thanks for reading this first episode of Mechanical Memories, and I’ll see you next time.
Mechanical Memories — A Tale of Three Thalias
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View this decklist on Archidekt
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TOO SWEET MTG - Thalia and The Gitrog Monster - Commander Deck Tech #magicthegathering
Jubilee Finnegan
Jubilee Finnegan (they/them) is English literature student and writer based out of Southern California. They got hooked in Magic with Throne of Eldraine and haven't stopped since. When not deckbuilding, they're working on poetry, gardening, or trying some new artistic endeavor. They can be found on Twitter at @finneyflame or on Instagram @jwfinnegan.
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