Too-Specific Top 10 - Colorless Spells
(Desecrate Reality | Art by Eli Manaya)
Cpells
Welcome to Too-Specific Top 10, where if there isn’t a category to rank our pet card at the top of, we’ll just make one up! (Did you know that Mascot Exhibition is the only colorless sorcery that makes colored tokens?)
There are a lot of things that get called rare in Magic, and then when you actually look it up there are closer to 100 examples. When it comes to colorless spells, however, prior to Commander Masters Eldrazi precon, there were only ever 15 colorless instants and sorceries in the entire game. Well, no more!
With a full 17 spells to choose from now, there is every reason to take a look at what's what, before the inclusion numbers start to climb for colorless decks in the wake of a new colorless commander with new colorless cards.
Top 10 Colorless Spells
Don't get me wrong: If you had a hankering to build colorless Spellslinger, then you'd still have a rough road ahead of you. With only 17 spells to choose from, the pickings are tough. No matter what, you're going to be relying on some outside sources like Chaos Wand and some recursion via things like Sword of Once and Future. Still, 18 may be a bit light, but it's not impossible. There's always been things like Primal Amulet and Twinning Staff to support spell strategies in colorless, what's always been lacking is the spells themselves.
So, what are the spells themselves?
Criteria: Colorless instants and sorceries. As is tradition, all results are ordered by EDHREC score.
10. Introduction to Prophecy
(7,309 Inclusions, 0% of 2,846,867 Decks)
I've lamented before about how much I wish that Learn worked a bit better in Commander. Don't get me wrong, I play Divide by Zero in my Spellslinger deck, the same as anyone, but how much cooler would it be for it to guaranteed go get another spell rather than just rummaging if you have the card available? In that exact scenario, I know that my Will & Rowan deck that's obsessed with lowering mana costs would grab Introduction to Prophecy out of the sideboard in an instant. Scry 2 and draw a card for three mana might not seem that impressive, but when you're in a deck that can reduce it to zero...
In similar fashion, a thing that people often miss when looking at colorless decks is how easy ramp is. Turn two mana-rocks become turn three mana-rocks that tap for multiples of mana, and the next thing you know, it's turn five and you've got 10 mana available. In that kind of environment, Introduction to Prophecy starts to look a bit better, although even the optimist in me thinks there might be better things to be doing if you're not specifically trying to force something silly like colorless Spellslinger.
9. Skittering Invasion
(7,542 Inclusions, 0% of 2,846,867 Decks)
While you've got all that mana, however, why not make more of it? Skittering Invasion is horrendously inefficient, but five tokens is also nothing to sneer at. The fact that these tokens can also make mana gets you into an entirely different category: The kind of category that lets you win the game with ludicrous amounts of mana and creatures next turn.
8. Environmental Sciences
(8,167 Inclusions, 0% of 2,846,867 Decks)
Even under the best of circumstances (where you've managed to get the mana cost of Environmental Sciences down to zero) I'm dubious about this card. Two mana to fetch a basic to your hand just feels bad, and the gain two life rider isn't enough for me to answer the question of why I'm not just playing an extra basic in this slot instead.
The answer, in our case, however, is cast triggers. Getting a land and a couple life may not feel that impactful, unless it's with an Aetherflux Reservoir or a Sphinx-Bone Wand in play. Sure, this would all still be better if we were grabbing these low-powered Lessons from the sideboard instead of drawing them out of the deck, but beggars can't be choosers!
7. Introduction to Annihilation
(11,407 Inclusions, 0% of 2,846,867 Decks)
Before Scour from Existence, Meteor Golem was the only way to remove a permanent in a colorless deck. With both options costing seven mana, it's no surprise that even with a heavy drawback of letting an opponent draw a card, Introduction to Annihilation is still seeing quite a bit of play. With that said, the sorcery speed does a lot to make me not like this card. Don't get me wrong, a colorless Spellslinger deck needs it, no matter what. In the average colorless deck, however, you'd be forgiven for skipping on this and throwing in a Steel Hellkite, a Lux Cannon, or a Bladegriff Prototype.
6. Titan's Presence
(13,356 Inclusions, 0% of 2,846,867 Decks)
So far, we've seen a lot of spells that feel way overpriced, but I'm happy to report that Titan's Presence doesn't feel that way at all. Don't get me wrong, it's no Swords to Plowshares, but with any kind of Eldrazi present, Titan's Presence feels great to have in hand. Three mana isn't that much to hold up in a colorless deck that should have seven on board by turn four or so, and exiling a creature is an effect every deck is happy to have. The "huge colorless creature" drawback can bite you every once in a while, but even if you have to settle for removing a utility creature with one of your smaller artifact creatures, you're still usually okay with that.
5. Warping Wail
(15,979 Inclusions, 1% of 2,846,867 Decks)
Speaking of exiling small utility creatures, it's Warping Wail! With three relevant modes, Warping Wail is a great tool that I've even used in both two and three color decks, and is an auto include in most colorless decks. While countering a sorcery doesn't come up all the time, it's usually a board wipe or a super impactful spell when it does, and if you do get bored of waiting, you can just remove a small creature or make a token to ramp yourself slightly. What's not to like?
4. Not of This World
(17,194 Inclusions, 1% of 2,846,867 Decks)
I was surprised to see Not of This World above Warping Wail, if we're being honest. Don't get me wrong, a free counterspell in your Eldrazi deck is really good, but it comes with all the caveats in the world. Even if you've got a Kozilek down on the board, your sense of security still only covers Kozilek itself, unless you pay seven mana for a conditional counter to try and protect your utility creature. I do like that it can also counter abilities, which is rare, but that doesn't do much to get rid of the overall bad taste this thing leaves behind. You should play it if you have a bunch of Eldrazi or even just one in the command zone in your colorless deck, just don't expect to feel that good about it when you see it in your opening hand.
3. Scour from Existence
(18,375 Inclusions, 1% of 2,846,867 Decks)
The instant alternative to Meteor Golem continues to see lots of play, showing up in 1% of all decks. This pales in comparison to the Golem itself, however, coming in at 73,274 inclusions, or 3% of all decks. The real question as to which deck prefers what, however, is still pretty simple: Can you abuse enter the battlefield triggers? If your answer is yes, then you should probably be playing the Golem. If not, then you should probably be playing Scour from Existence. It really just comes down to that.
2. All Is Dust
(41,064 Inclusions, 1% of 2,846,867 Decks)
The colorless board wipe is expensive, but effective. With sacrifice getting around indestructible, hexproof, and protection, there's really almost no way for threats to escape All Is Dust, unless they happen to be colorless. What really makes All Is Dust worth it, though, is the fact that for completely or mostly colorless decks it's the "guaranteed to kill everything" board wipe, but only for one side of the table.
1. Wandering Archaic
(71,879 Inclusions, 3% of 2,846,867 Decks)
Some of you might have done a bit of a double take, seeing Explore the VastlandsWandering Archaic[/el] up at the front instead of Wandering Archaic. That's right, everyone's favorite spell copier has a backside as well, maligned as it may be. And while you may be unimpressed with it, it still exists, and is a real option for Spellslinger decks specifically. Don't get me wrong, you're still going to cast the creature side most of the time, but if you just need more gas, Explore the Vastlands can do that. Even better, if you've gone nuts with cost reductions, it can often do it for free!
As for where this spell would be on the list if it were the only side of the card? I would say probably last, and even that would be a bit generous. If you are playing Spellslinger, however, you're still more than happy to see Wandering Archaic, especially in a deck that only has 17 spells to choose from.
Honorable Mentions
Speaking of, let's look at those other seven, shall we?
Top 17 Colorless Spells
11. Gruesome Slaughter
12. Spatial Contortion
13. Expanded Anatomy
14. Mascot Exhibition
15. Rise of the Eldrazi
16. Desecrate Reality
17. Calamity of the Titans
With the caveat that once again, the silly idea of playing a colorless Spellslinger deck means that we're going to play all of these no matter what, I do have some notes on where this full list has currently ended up. First off, Spatial Contortion seems wildly underrated. Instant speed +3/-3 is a very relevant effect, killing a ton of creatures, including many commanders. At the same time, +3/-3 can make a difference in combat as well, allowing a large creature to trade up or alpha strike through for that little bit of extra damage (or that lotta bit of extra damage in the case of double strike).
Next on my list of relevance is Mascot Exhibition, which doesn't blow me away, but does technically beat the curve when it comes to making a solid nine power and seven toughness for seven mana. The combination of Mascot Exhibition and Skittering Invasion did have me seriously considering Graaz, Unstoppable Juggernaut as the commander for this deck for a moment, however, which might honestly become the play in the future if we get more colorless spells that make tokens.
Lastly, it must be stated that the new Eldrazi spells from the new Eldrazi precon are definitely not staying at the bottom of this list (that spot should be reserved for Expanded Anatomy). Calamity of the Titans has gotten the initial hype, and I do think it will see a ton of play on the back of "cast this spell without paying its mana cost" shenanigans, but if we're being honest, I like Desecrate Reality a lot more. Seven mana is much more doable than twelve with three colorless pips, and removing three permanents while getting back one of your own straight to the battlefield is about as impactful as you'll see at instant speed. Of the three, I like Calamity of the Titans the least. Two colorless pips and a requirement to show a (probably) Eldrazi from your hand means that this is going to see next to zero play in colored decks, and is on shaky ground even in colorless decks packing a bunch of Eldrazi. What I do like about it in that specific deck, however, is that if you have a middling-sized creature in your hand and a bunch of Eldrazi in play, it's likely that you're going to wipe much of the board, probably followed by putting a couple Annihilator triggers on the stack. That's bound to win just about any game.
Speaking of, let's take a look at the deck that's hopefully gonna win us some games, shall we?
I was always thinking of this as a Battlecruiser type deck, given the limited cardpool, but I was pleasantly surprised in testing to see how often it could keep up with a mid-powered table, especially when it pulls a Chaos Wand or Knowledge Pool. You're just as likely to kill with combat damage as with triggers, but either way you're casting a lot of spells to get you there!
Nuts and Bolts
There always seems to be a bit of interest in how these lists are made (this seems like a good time to stress once again that they are based on EDHREC score, NOT my personal opinion…), and people are often surprised that I’m not using any special data or .json from EDHREC, but rather just muddling my way through with some Scryfall knowledge! For your enjoyment/research, here is this week’s Scryfall search.
What Do You Think?
And finally, what's your favorite colorless spell? Are you excited for any of the new Eldrazi additions, or do they all seem a bit superfluous to you?
Let us know in the comments, and we'll see you at the strange stone table that's just always... been here, question mark?
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