Mysterious LimousineMysterious Limousine | Art by Dan Murayama Scott
Hello, and welcome to Am I the Bolas? This week, wait, now that I know that, let me counter it!
This column is for all of you out there who have ever played some Magic and wondered if you were the bad guy. I'm here to take in your story with all of its nuances so I can bring some clarity to all those asking, "Am I the Bolas?"
I'm ready to hear you out and offer advice. All you have to do is email amithebolas@gmail.com with your story, a pseudonym you want to use, and of course, only include details you don't mind in the column! You might see your story below one day.
I'm Mike Carrozza, the newest member of the gang!
Shout out to all of us slingin' muck!
(Post edited for brevity, clarity, and then some.)
SUBMISSION
Hi Mike,
VERDICT
Thank you for writing and asking me to weigh in on your story. As I mention every week, if folks don't write to me, there's no column, so if you, the reader, want to send me a story, whether it's your own or one from Reddit or a friend's, please send it to amithebolas@gmail.com and I'll get to it here.
I gotta say, I think I'm team Krenko and Vondam on this one. I think there's no real walking this back unless the Mothman player actually suspected you of going after their stuff considering the Mysterious LimousineMysterious Limousine exiles something on ETB. The Mothman player read the card and assumed you'd go after the Krenko player and let it through. Once it enters, you can hit their commander, and now they've learned a hard lesson about the nature of Commander being a free-for-all battle royale.
While it can be helpful to keep an opponent in check or get yourself stabilized, an alliance in a Commander game can come to an abrupt end. Once you're too big to handle, you'll have to be on the lookout for some blindsides like this. It'll feel personal and like a dagger to the heart, but those feelings are also part of why we play Commander the way we do! It's exciting to evaluate your opponents and determine whether your trust in them is going to benefit or harm you in the long run. I don't see how this story makes you the Bolas.
However, if there had been further discussion and you were directly asked if you were going to target any of the Mothman's things and you'd said no, then I'd say you were being a stinkin' lil' lyin' Bolas. Even if you were to exile your Syr Vondam, Sunstar ExemplarSyr Vondam, Sunstar Exemplar (a card I know can be quite destructive) to murder their Mothman, it'd be a roundabout way of telling a truth that still stings like a lie, while only technically not being "in the wrong". This would still be kind of Bolas territory, but not full-blown. Being precise with your language is part of the fun for some folks out there.
Ultimately, in this case, the Mothman was betrayed, and that stings. While this is fair and valid, it doesn't make you a bad person. It's a war! You're competing to be the last one standing! You can't both win; even if someone played Divine InterventionDivine Intervention, there are no winners, it's a draw! Being a winner is a lonely affair. Hopefully, when it happens, people celebrate it for a second and then everybody gets to shuffle up and race to see who will be the next one. Every game has a lesson to learn in it and it's part of what we all love about the game, whether we know it or not. Unfortunately for Mothman, that lesson today was "be wary of allies when you've got yourself in a commanding position".
Not the Bolas!
Mike Carrozza
Mike Carrozza is a stand-up comedian from Montreal who’s done a lot of cool things like put out an album called Cherubic and worked with Tig Notaro, Kyle Kinane, and more people to brag about. He’s also been an avid EDH player who loves making silly stuff happen. @mikecarrozza on platforms.
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