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Ranking Every Equipment with EDHREC – Part 3: The Gate Industry: EXPOSED!
Herald, Buddy, Got a Sec?
Hi, average person reading this article. You can move on from the intro, this is not for any of you. This intro is for the people at Commander’s Herald, the new MTG website based on proving top Commander content. You already got some people from EDHREC, like Ben and Dana, as well as some other weirdos, but I’ve got an article idea for you that would bring swarms of screaming fans to your website. You’re gonna wanna sit down so you can throw yourself up in gleeful cheering when you hear it. You prepped, Herald? Okay. Here we go:
The Majestic: A 42 retrospective into the stunning history of the thorny cushmaster in all of our hearts
This is the article series that EDHREC has constantly missed out on, but you can finally get it, Herald! Withcoming out last year and being only the second Brusswagg in the entire history of Magic, the series has never been more relevant. This is a story that has to be told, and I’m giving you the opportunity to host it. Contact my agent, Herald, we can talk about selling the rights to the movie adaptation.
Anyway, while I want for the plethora of email, let’s get back to ranking every Equipment based on their number of decks on EDHREC.
250:: 84 Decks
makes look very sad, but it’s pretty unfair to compare a Commander Legends mythic to a Mirrodin uncommon, and +3/+3 for Equip 3 isn’t a terrible deal. It’s not the worst Equipment you could play in aggro decks, like , but I also would replace it as soon as possible.
249:: 84 Decks
I was going to say that this card would be cute with, but then Yuriko only cares about combat damage, and only targets creatures, so all around they did an incredible job of making sure a card from 2004 was worthless in EDH. Good job, Wizards!
Over, Under, or Just Right? Overplayed: What else is there to really do with this? All the Ninjas care about combat damage to players. You might as well run the if you wanna deal damage to creatures.
248:: 88 Decks
I did not play Kamigawa Limited, so it’s possiblewas a bomb in its time, but I am trying to imagine playing this card in Commander, and that seems so terrible that I love it.
Like, let’s assume the best case scenario where you slam this turn one, play aand equip this to the Bear on turn four. It’s gonna take till turn five for you to deal one damage. It’s gonna take till turn seven to deal three damage, and when you do that, you have to start all over again! Meanwhile, while you’re sitting there doing the worst Robin Hood impression, your opponents are casting , or for 25, but don’t worry! You’ll get through all those tokens eventually with your pretty bow!
Over, Under, or Just Right? Just Right: This card is a special type of garbage and I love it.
247:: 92 Decks
Moving up the cycle of, we have ! First strike can be very powerful… provided your opponents have creatures on the board, which isn’t guaranteed. If they do have creatures on the board, they might be so big that they basically won’t care about whatever gets in combat with it. Just first strike isn’t worth much, so it’s really only off being a very cheap Equipment that it sees any play at all.
Over, Under, or Just Right? Just Right: It doesn’t actually seem terrible in budget, but that’s about it.
246:: 93 Decks
There’s two cute things with this card. One isputting this on opponents’ creatures. Honestly, between this, , and , you could probably build an entire deck around putting bad Equipment on opponents’ creatures .
The other “use” for this is in. A lot of people tend to forget that Arcades doesn’t actually have defender, himself, so with this card, it makes Arcades get buffed by stuff like that wouldn’t normally help him. Neat.
Over, Under, or Just Right? Just Right: Do either of those uses make this card good? Not at all, but it does makes it interesting. This early on in the list, I will happily take that.
245 (Tie):: 94 Decks
A half the cards with Gate in the name , another 1/3 are , and a lot of the remaining cards are either or these gates that don’t actually seem to exist, I think the only gates that can be smashed by this is and . I can’t tell if this card is just terrible at its job, or if there’s some conspiracy where everyone pretends there’s a gate industry where no such industry exists. I’ll get back to you on this one., huh? Well, considering
Over, Under, or Just Right? Overplayed: If you want an actual review of this card, just look at.
245 (Tie):: 94 Decks
I did say that you would have to makesome absurd rate to make it playable, and is not that rate. Better? Certainly, but still mediocre.
Over, Under, or Just Right? Overplayed: Although, if they keep improving, maybe we will see two mana to cast, equip for zero soon?
243:: 95 Decks
They kinda got the numbers switched around on this card. I’d probably play this if it costs three and equipped for one, but do it the other way around, and it’s just gonna cost you a million mana to ever equip it more than once.
Over, Under, or Just Right? Overplayed:, maybe?
242:: 97 Decks
MEGA DEATHTOUCH! Obviously, the dream here is to put Lure creature, like , and eat an opponent’s entire board. Doesn’t even matter if the creature dies afterwards, although if you are worried about the, just slam a on your Elf, too! I wouldn’t play Sledge outside of a Lure deck, but in that deck, it’s hilariously effective.on a
Over, Under, or Just Right? Underplayed: Plus, it’s a super metal card name.
241:: 98 Decks
I seem to be finding a bunch of weird Equipment for. Here’s another deck idea for my short list, Traxos, but with bad Equipment no one has ever heard of.
Over, Under, or Just Right? Underplayed: And here’s another janky Equipment for.
240:: 100 Decks
I want to like. It seems like it could be a cute payoff for sacrificing creatures. People play just to get creatures to die, and Riteknife can do a lot more than .
It just takes so long to get to that point. How many counters on this thing is a good use of it? Three? Four? Even at six or seven, I could think of a lot of board states where even that leaves naught but a minor dent. You can move the knife around to sac multiple creatures a turn, but that’s a lot more work than just playing even.
Over, Under, or Just Right? Overplayed: Although, could you imagine if this didn’t require you to tap the creature, so you could just equip Riteknife to something and then eat your entire board? That’d be ludicrous! Why couldn’t we have gotten that?
239:: 104 Decks
If you hop in your DeLorean and go back to 2010,is probably playable in whatever Landfall deck you steal from the native time period. With the extra land cards you had at that time like or , you really need ways to always have lands to play. Back then, Hammer would probably have been nice as budget, secret tech.
Unfortunately, Hammer came out in 2016. By that point, Landfall had already gotten a lot faster, a lot less clunky, and found a lot of better toys to play with. That’s not even touching on monsters that came out later, likeand . Landfall can barely fit in cards like anymore, let alone a derpy land card like .
No, you wanna play Hammer now, you gotta restrict yourself. Mono-red, mono-blue , mono-black , Uh… mono-white ? Mono-colorless ? Whatever, you see the theme here. Introduce green and you can throw Hammer in the garbage.
Over, Under, or Just Right? Just Right: It’d prolly be the type of card you’d see me play in a derpyLandfall deck, and then lose to .
238:: 107 Decks
actually did pique my interest for a moment. You only need one opponent to have eight cards in the ‘yard to get the pump, so when the stars align, it’s +3/+1 for one mana. For an Equipment deck, that seems pretty good, but then the question ends up being how a deck like is going to mill an opponent for eight. It’s an interesting puzzle, but I was intrigued to see if any Voltron decks have figured that puzzle out.
Nope. Basically none of the decks playing this are Voltron-esque. Insteadis the card to blame for the play this card is getting. Now, on the one hand, should Anowan actually be running this? Not really. Rogues go wide better than tall, and paying three to equip this and attack for six damage a turn isn’t going to help Rogues very much.
On the other hand, it was in Zendikar Rising, which was the set that the Anowan precon came out with. Most likely, people opened in a random pack and wanted to slot it into the new Commander deck they bought, and you know what? That’s totally fine. It’s always kinda cool when you see a new card and realize the cool things it could do in your deck. It makes the whole thing more personal, and Carver isn’t anti-synergy with Anowan. A lot of his crew does have evasion, so even though it’s not the best, I’ll give the freaky skull a pass.
Over, Under, or Just Right? Just Right: I still would like to see it in likeor something. That seems cute.
237:: 108 Decks
I bet most of you read Afflict exits!” That kinda says more about Afflict’s playablity in Commander than I ever could.and went “Oh, right.
Over, Under, or Just Right? Overplayed: There’s some tribal Bolas cards on Dagger’s page since Afflict represented the Eternals of his army, but there has to be better, more flavorful cards to play.
236:: 118 Decks
In some ways, switching the Equip cost and the cast numbers onto make is a lot better. If all you care about is that an Equipment is attached, you’d rather just have it attached as soon as possible. The cheaper cost is a boon at first, but if it gets removed, giving a creature +1/+1 is never going to be worth three mana. Neither card is that amazing, but I think I’d rather have in most decks, just because if falls off, you’ll never want to re-equip it.
Over, Under, or Just Right? Overplayed: Look at that art and tell me which part is the knife part.
I’ll Stab You with Some Part of This Knife
Still waiting on that email, but I’m sure Commander’s Herald was just stunned into silence. While I wait for them to recover, let me know what you think about this batch of Equipment. Do you have a cute use for? Do you find as funny as it clearly is? Let me know in the comments! Until next week!